Sunday, August 29, 2010


SPAMMERS...As an artist I wanna be known as the "artist who actually wants to know who you are"if youre a fan I do actually want to get to know you...I mean if you a fan holla at me...I am approachable...I might even approach but if you wanna talk business, Talk To Me! ,the internet is not a place for the business man, sure there is business on the internet but the internet business isn't personal...As my enemy holla at me thats all I can say...if you anybody, a new homie, holla at me...anybody holla at me...and if you ask me about haters my reply will be I don't know of any...though I dont know anybody that I dont get to know so who are they?..I mean even if I make enemies, I will know them, I would not consider a hater as my enemy, thats belittling my enemy...They are strangers to me...If you are my enemy then you must be a certain caliber of person to be considered an enemy...I'm taking applications for those who wanna

I am not on the internet, on this blog talking about what I wish to talk about its a release... not anything else so don't attempt sell me anything...

I use the internet for this...VVV and music, FB, email things of importance to me not you....
Call me nerd but this is music isnt bad either


Monday, August 23, 2010

Breaking the silence

I posted something that I literally and most likely probably should never have posted, spilled milk.

For a little over a year now I've been dealing with some obvious emotional issues right?

well here it goes, we haven't spoken in over a year now. I have a class with you and from what I learned from the past is that maybe I should just be silent. Say nothing and not hinder your life or mine with things that don't matter. You are happier now, i think. Things in your life are falling into place and in mine as well. Of course since you i've dated many people along the way and I am sure you have too.

Bringing up old scars and wounds probably isn't the best for you at this moment anyway. I'm getting my associates degree in december, God willing and transferring anywhere I wish to. You have grown and changed and so have I.

Everyday I see you and say nothing its not cuz I'm mad or scorned or even vengeful...its quite the contrary. I hold my tongue because I don't wanna mess anything in your life up. I literally DO NOT want to mess up any of the things you have worked so hard for. From experience I know, when it comes to you, I am not a good person to re-introduce into your life.

Though even with all that said,  I still miss you. I miss talking to you, I miss your stories, I miss your companionship, and all that good clean stuff. Don't get me wrong the dirty is missed but can be lived without.

My frustrations aren't with you, or the situation, its with the outcome...

I lost a really good friend and it bothers me everyday....



I know I shouldnt
I know good and gotdamn well I shouldnt but I can't fight this much longer

Damn I miss ya
yes yes I miss ya
I miss ya
I'm jus dieing to kiss ya
I'll do what ever it takes just to get ya
what ever I gotta do just to never split with ya
ill take everything I own and trade it all just to be wit ya
and all I ask for in return is the truth when you wit me
baby your unforgettable and I just wanted you and me to be
and at the end of the night all I hope is that
you think of me
all I hope is that
You think of me
all I hope is that
You think of me
cuz I'm tryna be unforgettable.....
>>>[Unforgettable- Drake and Jeezy]<<<

Never thought a spark could cause a war, I know I shouldn't, and I'm not tryna start any trouble...

but damnit I fuckin miss you....


Saturday, August 21, 2010

A post on my recent thoughts

Recent me out I guess

The following are my options of schools to apply to, in order...

Ga State

UCF- Central Florida

St. Johns- Long Island New York

St. Josephs- New York

CW Post- New York

Kennesaw State- Georgia

Dowely- New York

MIA- Florida

FAMU- Florida


Its clear to the world I have still not made up my mind on which schools to apply to...I get my associates degree in December and literally I'm in panic mode...

My best friend asked me a question no one has ever truly asked me before. "Where do you want to be?"

What's worse is that I don't have an answer to that. All I know is that I want to travel, a lot. My body is used to it because of my last job. I crave that desire to be on the go. So I believe I've found what I want to be doing with my life, foreign relations/international studies along those lines. So I guess my next step is to find a way to get involved with organizations that do that, right? That way I am getting more experience under my belt.

I think I might be honest its better than saying I DON'T know...

Recently Ive been able to finally see that I love my freedom to do, come and go as I please. I love that I am single. I can say this for the first time in my life confidently, I love it, the switch up of women, but really I love the amount of freedom. Making a decision and only thinking of myself, literally. The moves I can make by myself the dreams of doing as I please for the rest of my life is enough...

I told my boy the other day, any amount of time in a cell is too long...I wanna go far and wide, I wanna go and yet still comeback to the people I cherish in my heart you know. I wish I had a companion to share the memories with but the journey in itself may be enough...

"I’m just riding round the city with my hood on and my windows down

Ask your girl, I’m the realest nigga she been around

When I pull up in something new and park it by the haters,

And when you get to talkin’ bout the greatest

I just really hope that
you’d think of me
you’d think of me
you’d think of me

I'm doin my thing
I'm doin my thing
I'm doin my thing

Cause I’m trynna be unforgettable"

My friend suggested I do YWAM...maybe..

Good Night world...


Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Your Screams

Your tried your hardest, I'm so damn difficult I made it impossible. It wasn't you, its me...and since then all I've been doing is workin on me

you still fail to realize what I did for you
no amount of words can turn blinds, its true
I'm impossible because I'm afraid to accept this
its always the same bullshit
They tell me life is hard but falling in love much is harder
Rap can be easy, but is even easier if your last name is Carter
a friend of mine showed me the good side of being selfish
someone finally put my madness in check by being selfless
I'm different and for years I strived to be average
and everyday I fail, seems like my lifes unwritten classic
the camera lens are never flashin
im tryna make some sense of it all but yet my minds stuck between the madness
and what coulda happened
movin forward tryna find a solution to it all
im so self centered i feel too good for the mall
I think its pity to fret over a label
especially when families is struggling to keep food on the table
with wars on different fronts im just tryna fall asleep at night
it seems everybodies got somebody to talk to right?
everybody but me, let no one in and thats what I get
lost in translation, phone calls never made it
but blunts are passed to the left, and beef with my right
black flags around my head, but your on my mind tonight

>>>[Unforgettable- Drake & Young Jeezy]<<<


Monday, August 16, 2010

Tell me

just call me

say hi

msg me

text me


i miss you...

Monday, August 9, 2010

My radio

My radio


Dawg somebody tell something
When all you have is nothing
But what u got is something
To most who grew up with all of nothing
When no where is ya home
And you clinging to the phones
Ashamed of what u have locked in ya chest
How can I continue to be right, when I write with my left?
I wanna make it epic
Fuck the game, no contraceptive
Make it or break it
Stand in the way and I'll make fake it
Hypocrite with long hair and red lipstick
My eyes see lies and I hear bullshit
Her tongues covered in sin, sadly she's the seed of the pulpit
Tabernacle bathingsuit covered in beads of holy water
Dawg the strippers the preacher daughter...
I'm loving what I see
I pause when I hear
The paces changes quickly
Lust draws her near
Give her something she feel
Better yet so vivid in truth she would swear that it was real
It's like stars collide when I catch her tongue
I still catch her lyrics flowing from my tongue
She sung...
Putting her to sleep better than her daddy did
Banging through her wheat thins
Her skin just the lid
Peel it back and watch her unfold from within
She seems to lust the sin
I see her skins cold, so I begin
Warm her up...
Thank so much
I've never felt this before
So close to my dreams
That every girl I adore
I tend to press ignore
I'm racing out the driveway
Mashing the button to close the door
120 on the highway
Racing to what I want
I've been missing my dreams so much it's hard for me to want more
Eventhough I'm all for
That shorty on all fours
I change the station
Waiting patient for day she comes knocking on my door...



*I have had writers block for weeks now...feels good to say something :]


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