Thursday, February 26, 2009

As February...

As February closes, and the days grow longer
I begin notice another with you I've grown another month stronger
I still have high hopes my love, with a lesser worrisome tone
I still dream of what did at Julianna's small and drunk home
The things we said I still do believe
I just hope I can save whats left of your heart and convince you to never leave
So its time to get back on my grind, and roll up my sleeves
I'm NOT gonna try harder, JUST not make you not leave
No my love I'm gonna remind of why we are here in this
of why were still in this relationship
I wanna remind you of what created our spark
and see the light that faded in you heart
flicker back up with power pride passion and sunshiney weather :)
I wanna show you I'm changing for you and for the better
I promise you I'm gonna hold on to you through all the bad weather
I'm gonna show you what we are building is way stronger and better
than any thing this storm can brew
I wanna show you how much I truly love you
yet at the same time show you why it is that you love me too

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Baby I deserve

Maybe I Deserve- Tank

Oooh hey hey well well well
Do you mind if I tell the
truth for a second ya'll

Maybe I deserve
to wonder who's calling so damn late
For you to say im trippin
it's just a homie from
upstate (said it's just a
homie)
Dont he know it's 1:00 in the morning
you say it's cool baby it's cool

Baby I deserve
for you to say he's coming
into town ( later on this
evenin)
and he's just wondering if you
and him can hang out
I dont like it but I know I gotta trust you
It aint cool cause I know it's true

Maybe I deserve
for you to go out and find some other guy
Maybe I deserve
for you to stay out with him all night
Maybe I deserve
for you to do all the things I did to you
Maybe I deserve ( oh yeah)
Maybe I deserve

Maybe I deserve
for you to go out and find some other guy
Maybe I deserve
for you to stay out with him all night
Maybe I deserve
for you to do all the things I did to you
Maybe I deserve ( oh yeah)
Maybe I deserve

For you to put on a sexy dress
for me to ask you Who the hell
you trying to impress
for you to laugh it off
like it aint nothing
I know it's something Maybe just maybe

Maybe I deserve
to sit a home and wonder where you are
is he kissing you touching
you holding you what
Take a drink and help ease my mind
I wanna be mad after all those times
Maybe I deserve
for you to go out and find some other guy
Maybe I deserve
for you to stay out with him all night
Maybe I deserve
for you to do all the things I did to you
Maybe I deserve ( oh yeah)
Maybe I deserve

Maybe I deserve
for you to go out and find some other guy
Maybe I deserve
for you to stay out with him all night
Maybe I deserve
for you to do all the things I did to you
Maybe I deserve ( oh yeah)
Maybe I deserve

for me to ask you where you been
Maybe I deserve
for you to say I better stop tripping
Maybe I deserve
To grab your neck until you let me know
Maybe I deserve
for you to run crying, crying out the door
Maybe I deserve
to grab my coat and chase
you down the street
Maybe I deserve
To say it aint you it's my own insecurity
Maybe I deserve
for you to say yes I cheated on you
Maybe I deserve
I wont care cause after all I put
you through I deserve
Maybe I deserve
I deserve yeah yeah yeah
To be mistreated sometimes
Maybe I deserve
to even be lied to sometimes
Maybe I deserve
Maybe you should go cheat on me
Maybe I deserve
Maybe I deserve

Maybe I deserve
Maybe I should sit and wait by the phone
Maybe I deserve
Cause I paged you about 3 or 4 times
Maybe I deserve
girl I know girl I know I
done put you through
Maybe I deserve
I done put you through hell
and I dont care
Maybe I deserve
and I dont care
and I deserve
see a man cant take another
man pleasing our woman
we cant even stand waiting by the phone
But we do the same shit


Damn ya'll I did it again :/

Sunday, February 22, 2009

90s baby :)

Just because you were born in '97 doesn't mean you're a 90's kid.

It's not like you could remember the original Simpsons. I am sorry but three conscious years of the 90's just wont cut it.



You're a 90's kid if:

You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain , and Two Stupid Dogs.

AAAAAAAH real monsters.

You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!

You just cant resist finishing this... "Iiiiiiin west philladelphia born and raised..."

You remember TGIF on ABC. Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.

You remember when, 2Pac and Selena died.

You remember when it was actually worth getting up early
on a Saturday to watch cartoons.

You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.

You remember reading "Goosebumps"

You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.

You remember the craze, then the banning of slap bracelets and slam books.

You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence...Not...

You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record "Your FAVORITE song of ALL time"

Where in the world is Carmen San Diego? was both a game and a TV game show.

Captain Planet. He's a Hero.

You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green Ranger were meant to be together.

You remember when super nintendo's and Sega Genisis became popular.

You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos... but never taped anything funny.

You remember watching home alone 1, 2 , and 3........and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"

You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.

You remember when Yomega Yo-Yos were cool.

when you were grown up when you turned 7, cuz you could watch are you afraid of the dark because it was tvY7!

You remember those Where's Waldo books..

You remember when Mortal Kombat Was "Da Bomb"!

U remember eating Warheads.(those sour candys)

You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.

U remember Ring Pops.

U remember drinkin' Fruitopia and Surge.

if you memeber when every thing was "da BOMB"

when they made the new lunchables so that you could make tacos and pizza!!

You remember boom boxes vs. cd players

Writing M.A.S.H. notes. (and the twenty different versions of that)

Making those little paper fortune cookie things.. and then predicting your life with them.

You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By The Bell"

You played and/or collected "Pogs"

You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet or Nano and brought it everywhere

...Furbies.

You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.

And Windows 95 was the best.

You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers,and Ninja Turtles.

You had a favorite New Kid on the block, and you knew all of there names

Michael Jordan was a king.

Yikes pencils and erasers were the stuff!

All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.(pencils.notebooks.binders.etc.)

You remember when the new Beanie Babies and talking Elmo were always sold out.

You collected those Beanie Babies.

Growing Pains.

Carebears and The Gummy Bear show.

Gak was the coolest thing invented.

Lambchop's song never ended.

The old dollar bills.

Silver dollars, were cool that have.

You remember a time before the WB.

You collected all the Troll dolls

You owned a portable tape player.

If you even know what an original walkman is.

You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.


You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"

You know the Macarena by heart.


"Talk to the hand" ... enough said

You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"

You know the significance of the number 23.

You went to McD's to play in the playplace.


You remember playing on merry go rounds...at the play ground.






When we were younger:

Before the MySpace frenzy...

Before the Internet & text messaging...

Before Sidekicks & iPods...

Before MIKE JONES...

Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX...

Before Sponge Bob
...Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.

When light up sneakers were cool.


When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.

When gas was $0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing.

When we recorded stuff on VCRs .

When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off our walkmans.

When 2Pac and Biggie where alive.

When the Chicago Bulls were the best team ever.

Way back.

when it was all about N64.



WHEN YOU TRADED POKEMON CARDS FOR A LIVING

Before we realized all this would eventually disappear

Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!!!!!

Friday, February 20, 2009

Your <3 I hope

Pardon me miss
But can I hope to inconvenience
Your Heart
for a moment beautiful woman
even if I couldn't
make it my own
one day in hopes
to make you smile
for a little more than a while
and not just for tonight
but the rest of your life
and the rest of the days sunlight
and the nights moonlight
where the stars shine as bright
as your eyes
which captivate me like your subtle surprise
and the sun beaming and warm and beautiful as your smile

maybe I'm wrong for still going on
and still hanging on
but pardon my intrusion
into your heart
I want neither a piece nor a part
but I was hoping that one day
I could make you mine
and make you see that your love belongs to me, you could say its mine

So you'll give me a chance and let me
I see what it is
Well guide me to where your love is
the place where the road is paved in your love
painted in your affection
to your everlasting love
I wanna be the one u sing about
write about
talk about
never walk without
dream about
laugh about
cry about
think about
scream about
the fact that you can't live without
me, or us, or all of what was
I wanna have all of your love

Show me the way to your heart where the warmth is
send me letters from heaven saying how powerful this love is

Baby I wanna be the one you make plans with
the one you call at night and fall asleep with
yes over the phone
when no ones at home
you call me to tell me come over so you don't have to be alone
The one who excites you
the one who always invites you
the one who ignites you
and sets you soul a blaze
while making the haze fade away
the one who opens your eyes
and shows you whats real and true
The one you call sweety, honey, boo
baby, babes, babe, bbz, tuya
tu vida, tu rey
tu amor
and more

I wanna love you like no other
that makes you feel like a potential mother
so happy and proud and grateful to be
The one you call your hubby to be
I wanna love you with passion unseen and unmatched

or maybe I'm just asking to much
and this is all a big dream
to one day have your heart

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

My problem and my apology


I am just too fuckin scared
I am too needy
I ask to much of you
I want to much from you
I give you the impression I don't trust you
I hurt you everyday
I make you sad everyday
I make you feel like you will never be good enough
I focus too much on him and not enough on you
I don't listen to you
I make you feel like I am never satisfied
I am a horrible boyfriend
and I don't deserve you
:'/
I'm not worthy of you
He deserves you
He is focused on you
He understands you better than I ever will
He is my problem that I fear like the Apocalypse
I try to look past him but I can't
I hurt you time and time again and you don't deserve anything that
I have put you through
and I would understand if you left me
I don't want you to leave
but I would understand
:'/
I'm sorry for all the damage that I've brought with me
I'm sorry I cause you so much pain
I'm sorry that my apology won't suffice to make things easier for you
I am to blame for every single time you have gotten yourself into some bull shit
you wouldn't normally get yourself into
I'm sorry for the thing with your parents, they wouldn't have done that to you if I had used restraint
I'm sorry you're stuck in the middle between him and me
I'm sorry for becoming a rift between those you love and happiness
I wish I could fix it all
I wish I could take away everything that I've caused
If I knew how I would
I feel like shit
I feel like the scum at the bottom of a lake
I feel low
I want to be with you
but at what cost to you
all I do is cause problems for you
I love making you happy but it doesn't seem like I do enough to off set the bullshit I put you through
I don't know what else to say other than I love you
I really do
but I'm starting to believe I don't deserve someone like you

The thing about you is
you are amazing
you are intelligent
you are multifaceted
you are everything I wish I could be
you are strong in ways I wish I could be
you are gorgeous
you are one of a fucking kind and you are a blessing to even know
you make everyday I spend with you a blessing
you are the last good thing I can find in Atlanta
If I lost you I don't know what I would do

You have never done anything to breach my trust
I pray you never will
I understand why you trust him
I do
I wish I could
I don't know what to do or say just know it frightens me to think of him and you in the same place without me
it bothers me
not cause I don't trust you
but because he could take advantage of your friendship
you say he won't
I really hope he doesn't....

Jessica Aybar, I Love You

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

RE: Love

Friday, January 30, 2009

Love

In peace, Love tunes the shepherd's reed;
In war, he mounts the warrior's steed;
In halls, in gay attire is seen;
In hamlets, dances on the green.
Love rules the court, the camp, the grove,
And men below and saints above;
For love is heaven, and heaven is love.
~ Sir Walter Scott (1771-1832)



For yours is heaven and heaven is yours
Your love is the water that helps the seed
The force beneath my feet and rumble underneath the sea
swaying back and forth I feel its power
amongst the trees never seizing, never stopping, even in the darkest hour
from my feet to my head to my back from my chest
your love flows through me; north to south; east to west
-HaS

20sb

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