Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Truth is

I've been waiting for something for so long. Truth is I'm still waiting...

"Truth is I'm not fully over it. I haven't fully moved on. Words can't express how deeply it hurts that I can't get in touch with you. No amount of words would suffice for the fact that I couldn't even get a Happy birthday from you. But what's worse is that I would forgive you in a heartbeat if you would just call me."

Words from the heart...These words sound like a woman's words to me. They don't sound like words that should come from a man's mouth in my mind. But then again they just did. Maybe that's the masculine side of my brain. I guess they are waiting for me to finally get over them, us, and everything that happened like it never happened. I think they want me to neither want nor ask for there friendship, or even acquaintanceship. I think that they even are waiting for the day that I stop waiting. I'm not sure but I don't really have a choice anyway right?

I know that deep down I don't like this hole in my life. I don't like this painful void within myself that I'm not sure will ever go away. I thought I had closure...I don't...I want something, words, a letter...something to make this feeling finally go away but all I'm left with is silence....

They once said,"...Silence says so much more..."


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