Thursday, October 9, 2008

El heroe roto

its hard to be happy when your not normally happy
when you have so much to be grateful for
so much to celebrate
so much to live for
so much to die for
so little to denounce yet so much to announce
my heart is broken still
i have someone who is fixing that
yet its like, why is that I'm still broken
why is it that she has to fix what someone else broke
it ain't her job
I'm broken
i'm lost and confused
i'm one of those people who appears to have their head on straight
who looks like they have their shit together
but on the inside its so fucked up
its hard to focus on anything important anymore
i find it hard to focus on school cuz i'm so damn focused on being happy
on feeling good, on smiling
with her i dont have to try its true she makes me smile with ease
but what about the vast amount of time we arent in contact
the moments of idle time sitting at work making a pizza(yeah *sigh*)
or the moments she's completely asleep and i'm awake
and the times i'm in the shower, taking a shower
i find it so hard to focus on life itself
theres so much i should be doing
but i cant focus on the shit thats on the outside
when everything on the inside is so fucked up
it aint cuz of one person
NO its numerous people
i constantly feel like i'm just a walking through life with stick to the ground
nothing else to guide
i wake up in the dark
sleep in the dark
eat in the dark
and show my love to those around me completely blind
i don't know where i wanna go in my life
i always feel like i'm supposed to do this great deed
or this powerful thing that affects the world
guess thats why i feel like i have to be a superhero
*sigh* even heroes cry

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