relapse

I cant do this to myself
I cant do this to my family
I cant do this to my God
I cant do this to my friends

I'm relapsing...

1 year wasnt enough to permenantly change me.
I am becoming weak, needy, emotional
I've lost my voice again
I can't hear God here
WHY!?

I have to change
I must change
I will change

I want to be the change the world needs
I want to bring change to this world
and being insecure, emotional, pouty, and weak is unattractive...

So this morning i am going to go back to who I was before i left NEW YORK

i left a man and I never want to go back to being a boy. I saw a boy in the mirror today...i saw it...I refuse to go back...

-Haze